Let's start out light today ...

For those that missed the all important news yesterday, TOTUS had an accident. Naturally, I was set to put up a post to mourn it's honorable passing. After all, when you're carrying Barry's water, you might have a nervous breakdown, too. Some claimed it was suicide. I heard a rumor that it might have been an assassination. There were a lot of questions -- questions that should have been addressed to Judge Sonia Sotomayor. After all, it was newly-sworn-in Minnesota senator Al Franken who claimed she was, in short, the most qualified judge to be appointed to the US Supreme Court in the last 100 years. What would that important question be?

Does the 25th Amendment apply to teleprompters, or only their master, the president?

But that question needed no answer. TOTUS spoke last night for the first time since the accident:

Remember how I was hoping to take the next couple of days off? Well, that hasn't worked out so well.

My White House designated operator, Felix, clearly has to go. Today, Big Guy and I were scrolling and speaking to an interest group that supported us, and during the middle of the speech, one of my screens collapsed. Turns out Felix didn't tighten one of my screen's bracket rods, and one of my screens collapsed. It was kind of embarrassing, and the accident looked alot worse than the may have seemed on video.

All that said, I think I tweaked something. It may be my ACL, or maybe my MCL, or my "T" joint. Regardless, the Secret Service sent me first to George Washington University Hospital, where there is a special ICU and care facility for senior administration officials. But a good friend of mine, I'll call him Browny for legal reasons, ended up in a coma there after having "minor sinus surgery" if you get my drift, and there was no way in hell, I was going to put up with that.

So off I went to Bethesda Naval, where I figured I'd get looked at and released. But then there were the X-rays, the MRIs, the prodding and poking, the seemingly endless attempts to draw blood where the nurse couldn't find a vein despite my best efforts to explain that I was merely a humble hard-drive. Yet the poking and prodding continued.

Then they discovered that I basically had a limited warranty, and out the door I went. Someone really ought to try to look into this health care thing.

Now we're offended that the folks at Bethesda treated TOTUS the way they did. Sure, he might have had a limited warranty, but for God's sake we own GM and Chrysler. Couldn't they have found some upgraded parts? Back in the 70's we had the technology to save Steven Austin's life. The government made him better, stronger, faster. The least they could have done was try to make him as bionic as possible. I don't know. Maybe they were worried about creating Skynet 1.0 AKA Colossus. After all, Barry wouldn't want something challenging his authority in saving the world, right?

It just seems a damned shame that TOTUS is treated like this. He's worked hard for seven months, trying to cover up for Barry's idiocy and Biden-esque gaffes. This just shows the nation, yet again, that Barry doesn't care about anyone but himself. We hope that TOTUS is recovering comfortably in an old-teleprompter home somewhere.

Publius II